Punishment

[czechmate]

So my third grader came home the other day and tolds me that a couple boys were talking in class (not him) and everyone in the class was forced to march around the perimeter of the playground blacktop 3 times. (Mind you it was 102* with a heat index of about 115* that day!)

Then he comes home today and tells me that the same boys were talking and once again the entire class was forced to march today -- but only 1 lap.

We've only been in school for 1 week and I don't want to be labeled as a problem mom, but what do I do?????

My kid is not the one talking and if he was, would marching in the heat make a difference?

I volunteered today to get to know his teacher and she said he was so well behaved and very studious, unlike some others in the class.

If I wanted my kid in military school I would have sent him there.
What do I do????
Jen

[ace12]

Hmmmmmmm..... I'm a 7th grade teacher, and I've made some bad decisions in my day that I can look back on and kind of re-think, analyze, etc.

I have a few questions, thoughts, etc... Is she a new teacher? Getting to know her is key. Try to understand what she is thinking. Tell her your concerns, that, frankly, you disagree. Ask her rationale. I think the most important thing, at first, is not to threaten to talk to the principal without at least talking to her. Now, if, she isn't receptive to talking it over, then a call to the principal is perfectly fine.

If this were a problem in my class, I'd possibly make the punishment fit the crime. I would probably ask these kids to give me some of their own time in silence- e.g., lunch. Now, I would also be giving up my lunch time b/c of their misbehavior, but, perhaps I'd call their parents first anyhow. I'd also have those kids talk to the principal, respecting each other, respecting teachers, learning environments...

I'm not sure where this teacher is coming from- it does sound strange. I'd be upset too. Let me know how it goes, I'm always curious how different teachers handle these situations (for better or worse).

Annie

[Regina]

My suggestions are to seek a phone call or some kind of contact with the teacher, without the acknowledgement of your child. That way, you are not undermining the teacher in front of your child. I would state that you are concerned about your child marching in 115 degree heat, especially for an action that he is not involved. From my personal experiences, schools are now teaching teachers not to use group punishments in their classroom (again, this is just from my schooling and my experiences with schools, and it doesn't apply to every school). If after talking to your child's teacher you do not feel that this is solved, I would go higher up to the principal....this is only after going to her first. Will she think you are a problem, maybe. Will she at least think about what you are saying, I would hope so. If she is childish or a complainer, she will go to others and tell them about your meeting; this might prompt a statement from them like, "Are you really making the kids walk outside like that?" Just be up front and compassionate with her about how you are worried about the heat and this group punishment, which it appears to you that these troublemakers are not caring about how this affects the rest of the class. I am sure she is trying to get it across to the class that she will not tolerate this misbehavior, but in my opinion, she is going about it the wrong way. I, personally, would not tolerate this form of punishment with my child....but going to her and explaining your concerns would be the first action that I would take....

[czechmate]

Originally Posted by ace12

Hmmmmmmm..... I'm a 7th grade teacher, and I've made some bad decisions in my day that I can look back on and kind of re-think, analyze, etc.

I have a few questions, thoughts, etc... Is she a new teacher? Getting to know her is key. Try to understand what she is thinking. Tell her your concerns, that, frankly, you disagree. Ask her rationale. I think the most important thing, at first, is not to threaten to talk to the principal without at least talking to her. Now, if, she isn't receptive to talking it over, then a call to the principal is perfectly fine.

If this were a problem in my class, I'd possibly make the punishment fit the crime. I would probably ask these kids to give me some of their own time in silence- e.g., lunch. Now, I would also be giving up my lunch time b/c of their misbehavior, but, perhaps I'd call their parents first anyhow. I'd also have those kids talk to the principal, respecting each other, respecting teachers, learning environments...

I'm not sure where this teacher is coming from- it does sound strange. I'd be upset too. Let me know how it goes, I'm always curious how different teachers handle these situations (for better or worse).

Annie

She's been a teacher for 6 yrs. She's working on her Master's and is 5 month pregnant with her second child. She just switched from 4th to 3rd grade AND switched classroom's 1 day before the open house. Obviously, she's got alot on her plate. But some of that is her choice!

I just don't think that she's "into" this year. I'm sure she's a great teacher but I just think that she's going through the motions until maternity leave in November.

My BFF is a Kindergarten teacher and her son is in the same class and she's not feeling great about everything that's going on so far. She was going to call 2 other moms (all 3 are teachers) and discuss their thoughts on our concerns.

I don't want to be that overly critical, annoying parent BUT my job as a mom is to look out for my kids.

It's going to be a looooooong year.
Jen

[Regina]

I hope they aren't planning on ganging up on her...Just voice your concerns with her, and that might make a difference. Yes, she does have a lot on her plate...don't we all....but be the bigger person, talk to her, and go from there. If I were that teacher, I would appreciate, especially if you were my room mom, coming to me and talking to me about it....just my opinion though.

[ace12]

All good points here....

Even though I'm a teacher, I have a strong maternal instinct; I totally agree that you are your child's greatest advocate!

(now, when we're talking about 7th graders and homework, it's a whole different story

[ASLhands]

In my experience, as a teacher, we look for a way to show the kids we won't put up with any bad behavior. I tend to be much more strict in the beginning of the year and then I am able to have fun as the year goes on. My students know I won't put up with any bad behavior. I disagree with her approach, though. She needs to be creative in singling out the 2 boys. I think after 2 times, you have a right to approach her in a nice way. She may not realize what she is doing. I agree with everyone else that you should go to her first and explain your concerns. I never think of parents as "problems" if they approach me in a nice way. The ones that are problems are the aggressive ones. I once had a child put in a class with medically fragile kids and that child was pulling out G tubes, biting, kicking, stepping on them. I told the principal that she was dangerous in that class. The mom came in that day and yelled at me: "You are very bad person. You don't take my daughter, you bad person!" (I don't have bad grammar, that is how she really said it!) THOSE are the problem parents. Good luck. It should work out fine.

[Bigsweetie]

I agree with what everyone else has suggested. I'd talk very kindly to her about it and explain how you feel.

If it happens again after that.... well the momma bear in me comes out and all bets are off! LOL! Raging pregnancy hormones seem to make me feel "superhuman" LOL! (as a funny story, I got snippy with a couple of girls at the playground yesterday who tried to tell my sweet little girl she couldn't play on the junglegym because it was "theirs". Yea, momma bear was in full force!)

Anyway, good luck!