Feast of Burden

[Brenda]

Thanksgiving day Hotlines aren't just for turkey's anymore. n There's help for any predicament!
I was reading this in a mag and thought I would share. If anything, it would be a good laugh, but you never know.

Turning leaf Vineyards Thanksgiving tips hotline:
callers must be over 21
November 19-22, 3-8 p.m. EST
866.998.5323

caller: "I fI drop my turkey on the kitchen floor and wipe it down with some wine, willit sanitize it?"
Operator: Well, wine does have 12 to 15 percent alcohol, and it was used as an antiseptic in the old days- so sure, why not?"

Crisco pie hotline
November 12-December 27 (Closed November 22-23) 8a.m.-8 p.m. EST
877.367.7438

Caller: " my pie crust recipe says to work the crisco in until the bits of crust are the size of peas. What kind of peas does it mean exactly-sugar snap, snow?"
operator: "[five second silence] You want them to look like little balls-like M& M's."
Caller: "Peanut M&M's or regular M&M's?"
operator: "uhhh. the regular ones. Any size in between is OK, actually."

Ocean spray Cranberry Consumer hotline
Monday -Friday 9a.m.-4p.m EST
800.662.3263

Caller: "can I make cranberry sauce out of cranberry Jell-o and Craisins?"
Operator: Um, bear with me.[long hold]
Unfortunately there's no substitute for cranberries in cranberry sauce. You're going to need fresh."