Just need to vent!

[lrcantrell]

I'm REALLY needing to vent right now and if I even try to do it to dh he gets all hurt, defensive, whatever so here goes!!! I'm just so tired of always being the one who has to do everything when it comes to this family!!! He's NEVER home!!! (only 8 days/month!) I have the dks 24/7, age 5 and 2! Don't need to say anymore about that, I'm completely exhausted with them! I planned our trip this summer and just found out that dh is on when we're supposed to leave for the airport (an hour away, LAX!) I called him this morning (of course, he's still in NY!) to try and work out a plan for me to get myself, luggage and kids to the airport. He's all "well, it's a month away, we'll just figure it out later, I may be there and could drive you!" HE"S NEVER HERE!!!! How on earth does he think that he "may" be here, that doesn't help! What am I supposed to do, wait until it's time to leave for the airport to figure out how we're supposed to get there if he's not here, which, I assure you, he won't be! I mentioned that I'd take the truck to the park n' fly and he could pick it up on his days off so it doesn't cost a fortune, his response "well, how am I going to get to the airport!". I think it's a heck of a lot easier for him to take the shuttle by himself then it is for me, the kids and the luggage to take it!!!! Then I'm trying to make arrangements for our pets, he's griping that it's going to cost $600 to board the dog and then he tells me that no one is going to want to watch ds#1's hamster for 3 weeks. Not offering any help mind you, just making me feel guilty for having to pawn her off on someone! When I tried to talk to him about cleaning her cage when he was home and we were away and then taking her to my friends (that way it would only be 2 weeks), he says, "we'll see". I'M SO TIRED OF THIS!!!! Maybe I'm just not cut out to be a pilots wife because all this is doing is making me seriously resent him and his career! Then he's all excited looking at his schedule because he and one of his friends have the same days off (4 days when we're gone of course!) and he says "alright, we have the same days off, we'll go play golf!" When do I get to have fun without the kids?!?!?! NEVER! AUGH! I need to just shut my mouth and be grateful for our health. Sorry for making this so long but you all are the only ones that can understand what this is like.