Can't he just beg me to go?

[jr_lenz]

Originally Posted by kelisaid

Well hi!

Yes he's already said in his heart he wants me there and that he wants to take me with him, so I know his intentions. I just don't like grey areas and I want it out there, straightforward. But I guess I gotta give him some slack, after all this is my life too and I can make this decision on my own.

he has asked you to come in three different ways, he has told you that he wants you there, I guess I'm confused what are the gray areas? Are there really gray areas, or are you making this harder then it needs to be?

understand this is not finger pointing bc I will be the first to admitt that if I was thinking about moving for a boyfriend I would be twisting and turning things all around and making a big confusing mess out of things.

just wondering if you are second guessing things because you are a little nervous about the move (which is ok by the way) and you are looking to him to answer the question that you really need to answer for yourself?

[FilleBelle]

I was gonna write a reply, then I got to this page and saw that jr had written it for me!

He told you he wants you to come with him, you told him you want to go. As flattering as it would be for him to beg you to come along, he doesn't need to. You already said yes!

[kelisaid]

just wondering if you are second guessing things because you are a little nervous about the move (which is ok by the way) and you are looking to him to answer the question that you really need to answer for yourself?

You pretty much nailed it on the head, I think i'm so stressed out about moving i'm almost making myself believe he doesn't want me to go so I won't have to risk everything I'm risking. Don't get me wrong, I want to go and be with him and see new things. I've always wanted to move, I was always just too afraid.

I wish he would just tell me that everything is gonna be ok and then I think i'd be fine. I think i'll talk to him about that tonight

[FilleBelle]

It might also make you feel better to think about what you would do in the event that everything was not okay. I mean, if you have a backup plan, maybe the risk won't seem so scary.

[elsja]

When I moved to be with my boyfriend (after almost 2 years of long distance), he never said "will you come be with me." We just discussed the options, discussed logistics and how it would all work and discussed that we wanted to be together- so the decision was natural.

THe idea of leaving was hard for me too- but i just had to (and still have to sometimes) remind myself that if things don't work out, or if I hate it- I can ALWAYS move home, just like you can always move back.

LOok at it as an adventure! You're willing to go, he wants you there, it's something new and different- it could be GREAT! Or you could hate it and you can simply work that out if that time comes. Who knows, you may love it and HE could hate it. There are endless possibilities- but in the end, I can tell that being together is your number 1 priority, so go with the flow and enjoy the experience!