Intuition......???

[Mrs.Alchemist]

Originally Posted by skibum515

Don't freak too much over the text thing - I know text messages frequently will get hung up somewhere, and won't arrive for several hours - or even the next day!

So true! Plus, sometimes they even arrive in reverse order... I LOVE texting when it's working well!

Aside from that - hang in there!

[ccbegay]

Originally Posted by Mrs.Alchemist

So true! Plus, sometimes they even arrive in reverse order... I LOVE texting when it's working well!

Aside from that - hang in there!

texting and voicemails! For example, heard my phone ring once last night, picked it up, first words, "WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN! I have been calling for the last 30 minutes!!" I don't think he was mad, just upset that he couldn't get a hold of me, even said he was going to call his friend to come over and check on me! After I got off the phone, I received all his texts messages one after another, my phone just went loopy...

I've been thinking about this, and I have a bad habit of creating scenarios in my head, and I know they are not true, I just do it, about something like your situation or even something about my brother and sister, when I relize that I am totally overanalyzing a situation I have to stop and shake it out...

[Bigsweetie]

Be careful of confusing "intuition" with insecurity or even paranoia. It's easy to let things in our heads get out of control

Is this the first time he's flown with a female? If so, it could just be some insecurity on your part. I'm not saying to turn a blind eye, keep your eyes open, but I wouldn't freak out just yet.

I would just ask some casual questions... like "how'd you get to the hotel?" I know there's times my DH will call for the hotel van to pick him up and wait over an hour for them to show up. If he rented a car, it should've been faster.

One time DH didn't call me til three hours after he'd landed and explained that he had paperwork to do, the offloading of the aircraft took quite a while, etc. There could be any number of reasons.

I would just ask him if it's bothering you this much. Unless there's good reason that you're feeling uneasy about this. If he's proven himself to be untrustworthy in the past, then I think you need to just put this "on file" in your mind and keep your eyes and ears open. If he hasn't ever given you cause for concern before last night, i'd cut him some slack and ask the questions you need answers to.

Good luck!

[BAC]

Have you ever heard of a self-fulfilling prophecy? That is when you think something might be true, and then you start acting like it is and seeing things to make it true and on and on. If I wanted, I could think myself into thinking my boyfriend was cheating on me or anything for that matter.

I'm sure your boyfriend wouldn't have just moved in with you and then turn around and start messing around with other women. (Unless he's a huge huge jerk, which he probably isn't!) If he sounded weird, he could have just been in front of other people and not have the privacy he usually does while talking to you, or he was tired.

I agree with the other posters, just ask him if there was a delay and if everything is fine. If he keeps going on trips and you keep getting icky feelings, then cross that bridge when you get to it.

[katherine2473]

Originally Posted by Bigsweetie

Be careful of confusing "intuition" with insecurity or even paranoia. It's easy to let things in our heads get out of control

I completely agree with this! Sometimes I think it's v easy to give in to insecurity, which gives that sinking stomach feeling, which can lead us to 'know in our guts' that something is wrong. But it's not - it's our own demons that are the problem. For example, a few weeks ago I was convinced my DH didn't actually want to be trying for a baby - I 'knew' that he wasn't that fussed that we were having problems. I really laid into him about his lack of concern etc etc. Thought about it some more - no, he wasn't saying or doing anything wrong, it was my own worries and ambivalence about being ready etc that were coming out. V unfair of me.

If you've just moved in together, is it possible you're experiencing some doubt and a touch of cold feet, and you're externalising it? Sort of like your inner demons are trying to mess things up just because you're settling down?

Hope it works out for you!

[patty@myflightsurgeon.com]

Originally Posted by skibum515

Don't freak too much over the text thing - I know text messages frequently will get hung up somewhere, and won't arrive for several hours - or even the next day! Also, DF has been in the shower when I've texted him and he won't look at his phone for a while so he won't notice it's there. Just give him a call you'll feel better

My daughter texted me at 8:45 am to let me know she was going to work and be out at 3:30 pm.
(She normally calls before work and hadn't so I was texting her calling her phone and she wasn't answering ( MORE WORRIED) She works at a convenience store and they are not allowed to have there phones on.

To make a long story short. I recieved her e-mail that she texted at 8 am at 3:25 pm. So texted are UNRELIABLE.

Sorry so long

[h0t4jel]

Hey All,
I cannot thank you all ENOUGH for your input. You are all special women who obviously and wonderfully wise!

So here is the scoop:
I was really trying to keep the "demons at bay" as I am not an insecure person or have ever had to doubt him in any way. This is absolutely a first and so I distracted myself with my son, an exursion to the mall, target and wrote some old friends.

My son fell asleep ( still BF not called) around 8pm which was fine, yet I was watching a movie on the couch (after lots of puttering around, treadmill and cleaning....) When I texted him I would speak to him tomorrow as I really just jumped out of my skin when my phone would buzz or go off and I was exhausted.

He texted back ASAP ( i thought he was in the air?)
that he was going to dinner with his Mom (like i thought he would do) and
could he call me later. I told him not to worry to enjoy his time with his mom and I would speak to him later, as I thought it was lame for him to be preoccupied with me when he gets so little time with his mom up north, it would be really stupid and selfish for me to say something now, and spoil his time.

So around 11, I was half asleep, I get a "You up?" text. "Kinda sleepy but yes" I answered and he called...

I didnt say anything but hearing his voice, was all i needed to be reasonable and he said things were just going awful and how much he wanted to go home ( probs with some maintainence on the plane, beauraucratic company politics etc..)
and about 20 min into the call, I had forgotten everything as he had me laughing and he was saying how much his mom wanted to meet me and how if I was settling into the house ok...

So all just felt right, but he kept asking me if something was "specifically wrong" something told me he knew but just kept things as they were....
and by then i could have caredless because I was just reminded how happy I really was.

It made me think he would never do something like that and how much he means to me.
It has NOT been easy STILL. My gut is still groaning, but I think that more just wanting him home already.

[Mrs.Alchemist]

Glad to hear that you're feeling better!

[Regina]

I agree with following your gut. Good luck!

[flygirl813126]

I'm glad that things worked out. It is important to be able to get those demons to leave when they sneak in. (I need a cute smiley that hides somewhere.) It sounds like things are great in the relationship and yeah for that!