I am soooo pissed off at SO right now! - Page 2

the_woman_99 · 12-12-2007, 01:35 PM

First off yes I was kidding about the 'serves him right'. I would never let him go a holiday or special occasion without getting him something. I am just not that way. With us not seeing each other right now we give each other a lot of shit to 'lighten' up the mood.

I was upset yesterday by the fact that he went out and did it around this time of year. He has complained from the very beginning that he hasn't renewed his subscription and needs to do it. BUT it is one of those things that people always talk about doing but NEVER really actually do. At least he usually isn't like that especially with moving again within 6 months of moving the last time. Oh well he did it and I missed the look that I was waiting for. I love the look on his face when I do something he doesn't expect or give him something he never thought that I would do. Does that make me a bad/selfish person???.....I dont think so!!! Right now I want those moments because we HAVEN"T been able to see a lot of each other since he moved away the end of July. I think that I am entitled to want those moments. Those moments are what get me through being seperated right now from him.

It hasn't ruined my Christmas, just the anticipation of how much he would have loved the gift had he not known about it. I know that he will still love it and get a lot of use out of it. I am not returning it or anything. He is still getting what I had planned for him but it just isn't as exciting as that gift would have been for him. Oh well.
I had every intention of going out and spending more money on him to replace the gift for him but the more I thought about it last night the more it didn't make any sense to me. I am here working 3 jobs to save as much as I can so that we can live together again and it just isn't worth the money to go out and spend more when he doesn't care either way. We have talked about it since and have both agreed that it doesn't matter and we just want to be together.
We were never fighting over this I was just upset at the fact the suprise was ruined. He felt bad for ruining the surpise and I explained that it wasn't his fault. I was just taken off guard by the fact that he would acutally go out and buy it for himself after bitching about it so much over the last year.
There is nothing left for us to say to each other about it because we are just dropping it. We both decided that it isn't a big deal and we just don't care.

We are just going to enjoy the time that we get to spend together!
It has been longer than either one of us imagined we would be apart. We get to bring in the new year together which means a lot of great things for us.

Bigsweetie · 12-12-2007, 02:17 PM

Don't sweat it Danielle! You just had what I call "a girl moment". I get them a lot. I get myself all pissed off over something silly, then the next day i'm thinking "jeez, I overreacted on that one, didn't I?" LOL! It happens.

I know how you feel though. Eric is FAMOUS for buying himself things right before Christmas and his birthday. It used to drive me crazy, but now, instead of trying to surprise him- I have him give me a list. That way, if he buys himself anything off that list - he's in trouble! LOL! J/K!!!

A funny story though....

I got Eric a REALLY nice, expensive computer chair for a wedding present. I used to work as a designer for a office furniture dealership and there was one that he LOVED but was really expensive. Well, we had some at the warehouse that came in the wrong color and they were trying to get rid of them. I happened to be good friends with the lady who was organizing getting rid of these chairs. She gave one to me at cost!!!

The whole office new about it and they were so excited! The day came for me to give it to him. I put it up on a pedestal that we had in our lobby that had a spotlight on it. I took him out to lunch and then told him we needed to swing by my office for a minute.

As i'm standing with him at my desk (I took him in the back way so I could escort him to the lobby and tell him that was HIS chair on the pedestal), one of the salesman comes up and says "So, how do you like your chair?". The look in my eye at him could have cut through him like butter! LOL! So, of course, surprise ruined. The salesman felt HORRIBLE, and of course I teased him about it for months. But oh well.

BTW- I'm sitting in that computer chair right now! LOL!

We still laugh about it to this day.... and you will too!!

(((HUGS)))

TheWife · 12-12-2007, 02:59 PM

I have an idea, instead of having his gift cards sitting under the tree, or whatever method you may have planned on, tell him you have to "go get it" out of the bedroom. Then come back in nothing but a Santa hat and a big red bow tied across your "girls", with the gift cards stuffed into your cleavage. I guarantee you, you will get the "face lighting up" you want, probably even more so than if the gift cards had remained a surprise.

spotty4 · 12-12-2007, 05:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheWife

I have an idea, instead of having his gift cards sitting under the tree, or whatever method you may have planned on, tell him you have to "go get it" out of the bedroom. Then come back in nothing but a Santa hat and a big red bow tied across your "girls", with the gift cards stuffed into your cleavage. I guarantee you, you will get the "face lighting up" you want, probably even more so than if the gift cards had remained a surprise.

I think Michelle just hit the jackpot! Go for that, Danielle!!

the_woman_99 · 12-12-2007, 05:33 PM

I don't think that would work seeing as how we will be staying at his dads house when we are together. Maybe minus one day where we will be setting up the new apartment in PA.
But that would be a nice thought if we were by ourselves and lets be honest he has asked for something like that for Christmas.

Bigsweetie · 12-12-2007, 08:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by the_woman_99

I don't think that would work seeing as how we will be staying at his dads house when we are together. Maybe minus one day where we will be setting up the new apartment in PA.
But that would be a nice thought if we were by ourselves and lets be honest he has asked for something like that for Christmas.

Well, then you'd get to his reaction AND his dads!! LOL!

Kristie · 12-12-2007, 11:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by katherine2473

I could be nice and stick with JR Lenz but... come on love, get over yourself!! I think you might have the whole gift giving thing a little confused here... You don't give presents to make yourself feel good surely?! You give presents that you think the other person will like, will make them happy. Your present sounds like it will do that (come on, how much better endorsement of a present is there than that he wanted it so much he bought it himself?!). He hasn't 'ruined his gift' - he's 'ruined' your little back patting moment when you see his face light up and feel like such a good girlfriend! He's not at fault! You seem to have a lot invested in 'being a great gift giver', and I wonder why? Do you not feel appreciated generally? Anyway, that's by the by. Christmas is about a lot more than giving/receiving presents! And there is a damn sight more to a happy relationship than the money you spend on each other or the gifts you get - I can pretty much guarantee he'd rather have a relaxed happy day with you laughing about this mistake (no guilt trips!) than the greatest most imaginative present ever, so please try and take a step back and relax!
And 'what she said' to Michelle!

to be honest, that type of attitude is pretty prevelant in this country... we're taught, IMO, at an early age that christmas is about spending as much money as you can to "show" how much you care...people are trying to get the whole christmas spirit but miss it due to the whole commercialism thing over here...

it could be the only ones not caught in this mess are the families that are *really* together without the typical dysfunction and so forth that teach their young ones the true way to celebrate...i really don't know...i don't have that kind of family...

But i remember having that attitude as well when i was in my 20's and it took a few years to really learn that buying gifts isn't really what makes "my" christmas (also part of the reason i don't wait for an actual holiday to bring on the gifts)... I don't blame Danielle for having that type of attitude, i blame society for creating it and i betcha that this will be the year that Danielle learns the true meaning of spending the holiday together considering that she hasn't seen her man in over 3 months...

hell, i'd be frustrated too...

flyershoe · 12-13-2007, 09:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kristie

to be honest, that type of attitude is pretty prevelant in this country... we're taught, IMO, at an early age that christmas is about spending as much money as you can to "show" how much you care...people are trying to get the whole christmas spirit but miss it due to the whole commercialism thing over here...

You are totally right!!

mum · 12-14-2007, 06:54 PM

The Grinch here. I hate Christmas. The orgy of excess, the expectations, the disappointments. The stress of forgetting someone on the card list, the money, the money, the money that has to get spent that I can never afford. But I do like the Transiberian Orchestra.

Funny gift story. My SO gave me birthday and xmas gifts the fist year we were together. One was a dustbuster. Gee, just what I always wanted! The other was a WalMart wall clock (SO likes to know the time) that I hated but put on the wall for about a year. Finally I planned it's demise. I accidentally on purpose dropped it on the floor thinking it would break. 5 more accidents and the dam thing still won't shatter. Finally resorted to taking a hammer to the thing and the deed was done. SO came home and immediately offered to run to WalMart and buy it's exact replacement. I said no, and he isn't as dumb as he looks because he suspects I murdered his clock still to this day. I will never confess.

Happy Holidays to y'all.
Or Bah Humbug. ;-)

12-12-2007, 01:35 PM	#11 (permalink)
the_woman_99 Jetgirls Member Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: PA Posts: 396 Recipes: Thanks: 2 Thanked 3 Times in 3 Posts	Re: I am soooo pissed off at SO right now! First off yes I was kidding about the 'serves him right'. I would never let him go a holiday or special occasion without getting him something. I am just not that way. With us not seeing each other right now we give each other a lot of shit to 'lighten' up the mood. I was upset yesterday by the fact that he went out and did it around this time of year. He has complained from the very beginning that he hasn't renewed his subscription and needs to do it. BUT it is one of those things that people always talk about doing but NEVER really actually do. At least he usually isn't like that especially with moving again within 6 months of moving the last time. Oh well he did it and I missed the look that I was waiting for. I love the look on his face when I do something he doesn't expect or give him something he never thought that I would do. Does that make me a bad/selfish person???.....I dont think so!!! Right now I want those moments because we HAVEN"T been able to see a lot of each other since he moved away the end of July. I think that I am entitled to want those moments. Those moments are what get me through being seperated right now from him. It hasn't ruined my Christmas, just the anticipation of how much he would have loved the gift had he not known about it. I know that he will still love it and get a lot of use out of it. I am not returning it or anything. He is still getting what I had planned for him but it just isn't as exciting as that gift would have been for him. Oh well. I had every intention of going out and spending more money on him to replace the gift for him but the more I thought about it last night the more it didn't make any sense to me. I am here working 3 jobs to save as much as I can so that we can live together again and it just isn't worth the money to go out and spend more when he doesn't care either way. We have talked about it since and have both agreed that it doesn't matter and we just want to be together. We were never fighting over this I was just upset at the fact the suprise was ruined. He felt bad for ruining the surpise and I explained that it wasn't his fault. I was just taken off guard by the fact that he would acutally go out and buy it for himself after bitching about it so much over the last year. There is nothing left for us to say to each other about it because we are just dropping it. We both decided that it isn't a big deal and we just don't care. We are just going to enjoy the time that we get to spend together! It has been longer than either one of us imagined we would be apart. We get to bring in the new year together which means a lot of great things for us. __________________ Danielle http://danielleandmarshall.blogspot.com/

12-12-2007, 02:17 PM	#12 (permalink)
Bigsweetie Member Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: Clinton Township, Michigan Posts: 1,562 Recipes: Thanks: 8 Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts	Re: I am soooo pissed off at SO right now! Don't sweat it Danielle! You just had what I call "a girl moment". I get them a lot. I get myself all pissed off over something silly, then the next day i'm thinking "jeez, I overreacted on that one, didn't I?" LOL! It happens. I know how you feel though. Eric is FAMOUS for buying himself things right before Christmas and his birthday. It used to drive me crazy, but now, instead of trying to surprise him- I have him give me a list. That way, if he buys himself anything off that list - he's in trouble! LOL! J/K!!! A funny story though.... I got Eric a REALLY nice, expensive computer chair for a wedding present. I used to work as a designer for a office furniture dealership and there was one that he LOVED but was really expensive. Well, we had some at the warehouse that came in the wrong color and they were trying to get rid of them. I happened to be good friends with the lady who was organizing getting rid of these chairs. She gave one to me at cost!!! The whole office new about it and they were so excited! The day came for me to give it to him. I put it up on a pedestal that we had in our lobby that had a spotlight on it. I took him out to lunch and then told him we needed to swing by my office for a minute. As i'm standing with him at my desk (I took him in the back way so I could escort him to the lobby and tell him that was HIS chair on the pedestal), one of the salesman comes up and says "So, how do you like your chair?". The look in my eye at him could have cut through him like butter! LOL! So, of course, surprise ruined. The salesman felt HORRIBLE, and of course I teased him about it for months. But oh well. BTW- I'm sitting in that computer chair right now! LOL! We still laugh about it to this day.... and you will too!! (((HUGS)))

12-12-2007, 02:59 PM	#13 (permalink)
TheWife Jetgirls Ol' School Member Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Utah Posts: 1,264 Recipes: Thanks: 1 Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts	Re: I am soooo pissed off at SO right now! I have an idea, instead of having his gift cards sitting under the tree, or whatever method you may have planned on, tell him you have to "go get it" out of the bedroom. Then come back in nothing but a Santa hat and a big red bow tied across your "girls", with the gift cards stuffed into your cleavage. I guarantee you, you will get the "face lighting up" you want, probably even more so than if the gift cards had remained a surprise. __________________ Michelle~Wife to Corbin 09/09/1999 and Mom to Caleb 05/18/02~Kyla 01/03/05~Bryton 02/03/08

12-12-2007, 05:33 PM	#15 (permalink)
the_woman_99 Jetgirls Member Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: PA Posts: 396 Recipes: Thanks: 2 Thanked 3 Times in 3 Posts	Re: I am soooo pissed off at SO right now! I don't think that would work seeing as how we will be staying at his dads house when we are together. Maybe minus one day where we will be setting up the new apartment in PA. But that would be a nice thought if we were by ourselves and lets be honest he has asked for something like that for Christmas. __________________ Danielle http://danielleandmarshall.blogspot.com/

12-14-2007, 06:54 PM	#19 (permalink)
mum Jetgirls Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: VA Posts: 39 Recipes: Thanks: 0 Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post	Re: I am soooo pissed off at SO right now! The Grinch here. I hate Christmas. The orgy of excess, the expectations, the disappointments. The stress of forgetting someone on the card list, the money, the money, the money that has to get spent that I can never afford. But I do like the Transiberian Orchestra. Funny gift story. My SO gave me birthday and xmas gifts the fist year we were together. One was a dustbuster. Gee, just what I always wanted! The other was a WalMart wall clock (SO likes to know the time) that I hated but put on the wall for about a year. Finally I planned it's demise. I accidentally on purpose dropped it on the floor thinking it would break. 5 more accidents and the dam thing still won't shatter. Finally resorted to taking a hammer to the thing and the deed was done. SO came home and immediately offered to run to WalMart and buy it's exact replacement. I said no, and he isn't as dumb as he looks because he suspects I murdered his clock still to this day. I will never confess. Happy Holidays to y'all. Or Bah Humbug. ;-)

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