New and in need of HELP!

[Bigsweetie]

Originally Posted by Kristie

I guess that's not what i'm seeing out of the post.. it could certainly be part of the big picture as i see more than one fork in the road of confusion! haha

It seemed to me that he's trying to force settlement without marriage by supporting and trying for a kid for an entire year vs getting married AND getting a dog when she didn't want a dog. to me, it seems like it's two fold problem. she wants the marriage/commitment and she doesn't want him to leave (ie: getting pregnant) at the same time, he wants to stay with her (ie: getting pregnant and settling into "normalcy" by bringing a dog into the mix) without the commitment...that's a hard one to solve..if she really wanted to get married, she shouldn't have given in and settled for getting pg first..bringing a kid into the mix never solves the issue, it just makes it more complex, harder to solve.

I completely agree with the that!!!!

But isn't she holding back on moving to be with him because they're not married? Sounds like an ultimatum to me (marry me or i'm not moving anywhere) which to me sounds like she's forcing his hand.

IMHO if he wanted to marry her, truly, he would have asked her already. Certainly if that was his goal he would have asked her before,during, or shortly after the pregnancy. It doesn't sound like she indicated to him that she wanted to get married before they started trying for kids. It wasnt' til they'd been trying for a year that she suddenly changed her mind?

[scissorhands]

I agree with big sweetie.......

[Kristie]

Originally Posted by Bigsweetie

Certainly if that was his goal he would have asked her before,during, or shortly after the pregnancy.

ahhh good point!! VERY good point!