Boyfriend in Sweden for 7-8 weeks

[Sophie]

Hello Everyone

I am feeling so fed up today, and I shouldn't be, as this is what we have been working towards for the past year and a half.

My darling BF has just been offered a job and will be going to Sweden for 7-8 weeks at the end of July. I have just seen on the internet where he is going to be staying and it looks really nice and there were lots of very gorgeous Swedish women in the photo's.

I'm feeling rubbish now. I get to stay in London which is a dump!! DOn't believe the Notting Hill film!! Unless you are a millionaire you can't afford a one bed flat in a half decent area!!

The flat I live in is a building site (we are renovating a flat) sharing with a couple who TOTALLY do my head in, and he gets to live in comfort in a hotel, with lots of lovely blondes floating around. He is a very handsome guy and gets a lot of female attention (which has been difficult for me to handle sometimes) and it's making me feel worried.

I need to be mega confident, but I don't feel it at all. I feel boring, my job is rubbish, I am going to miss him. I said to him the other day I feel like he has a mistress, bloody aviation.

I know I have to trust him, but it's still not easy for me after trusting men before and being shat on from a great height.

Sometimes I wonder if I'm cut out for all this. Love him as I do, it is causing me pain, always missing him the uncertainty of what the future holds.

He needs me to be strong for him, but I don't feel it right now, I just feel sad and worried and I know I'm going to be lonely whilst he is away.

Even when he gets back we don't know where he will be for the following 6 months .

It's rubbish.

Moan over.

If you have read all of this, thanks for listening.

Sophie