Tell me we're not crazy..... - Page 2

Tonya · 10-14-2005, 09:52 PM

Also remember these days with free long distance on cell phones and instant messaging on computers you can still keep in touch.

My DH has finally finished upgrading to the Captian seat in the 757 and he has been home only 7 days in the last 3 months due to the training and now being low man on the captain senority list. However we had one of the best nights together last night. I am in Tulsa and was in Maine. We watched Survivor and CSI together while we were on our cell phones to one another and then we got on line and instant messaged each other for an hour sharing stories about our day, news articles we had read, ideas, and photos. Some times it would take to much to explain what we meant so we would just pick up the cell phone and clarify.

With the technology these days you can still share your lives even if you only see each other occasionally.

In the ten years I have been with my DH we have gone through 4 years of him home only 3 or 4 days a month (usually the days I had to work). One whole summer that he never left home and everything in between.

Just remember to remain flexible and you will be OK and that is all that really matters.

MQAAord · 10-15-2005, 01:51 PM

Go for it.

Non-airline people DON'T understand. OTR truck divers and military are the only other people who could possibly have any clue what our lives are like.

You'll hear lots of things from non-airline people, including:

"Well, you know he's gonna be fooling around with those flight attendants on his overnights."
"What do you mean you can't afford it? Your husband's a pilot, they make lots of money."
"Oh, he's a pilot? All they do is sit up there and push buttons and read the paper."
"Those pilots are paid way too much. They don't do anything to earn all that money."

You learn to educate people as best you can, and blow the rest off.

roz · 10-15-2005, 08:07 PM

I have a friend who is married to a guy in the merchant marines. He's gone for six months at a time.

Bigsweetie · 10-15-2005, 10:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MQAAord

Go for it.

Non-airline people DON'T understand. OTR truck divers and military are the only other people who could possibly have any clue what our lives are like.

You'll hear lots of things from non-airline people, including:

"Well, you know he's gonna be fooling around with those flight attendants on his overnights."
"What do you mean you can't afford it? Your husband's a pilot, they make lots of money."
"Oh, he's a pilot? All they do is sit up there and push buttons and read the paper."
"Those pilots are paid way too much. They don't do anything to earn all that money."

You learn to educate people as best you can, and blow the rest off.

That's usually when I show them my foodstamp card! LOL!

Lurker · 10-17-2005, 12:29 AM

What I wouldn't give for BF to be only 100 miles away insted of 6,000.

biochemtine · 10-17-2005, 12:40 PM

ahhh ..... but we did the dating thing and now we're married. it's much different being married than dating. I could handle it when we were dating.

dimplespoo · 10-23-2005, 12:03 AM

I am in the same situation right now except hubby is quite a few more miles (about 3500 miles right now). I am in Alaska, Hubby is in South Korea. He has been there since Oct. 2004 and won't be home for good until Oct. 2006. He is military and was only supposed to be gone for 1 year. We did this so we could try to stay in Alaska and I could keep my job. We found out about 4 months into the first year that we were not going to be able to stay in Alaska and would have to go to Oklahoma. Not the worst but not where we wanted to be. So hubby put in to stay another year. He got the other year and a 3 year tour back to Alaska after that. He get a trip home 1/2 way through each tour for 30 days. I make a trip every 3 months from that. He left in Oct. I saw him in Feb, he was home in May, I went back over in August and now won't go back to see him until late January.

We love Alaska and we wanted to keep me in my job here. It is a great job (all three of my bosses are military so they understand short notice hubby has to leave which makes it very nice). We had most of our trouble (or people not understanding) from Military friends. One told me that I didn't LOVE my husband enough if I was willing to "let" him do this and another told me I was more into the money from my job them my hubby and my marriage. I had a hard time with this but we are making it work.

My advice if I can put in my .02... Make this time apart a way to make you better. Grab a new hobby - I found that I am learning to do alot of things that hubby would normally do that I am taking care of now. This summer I tore the lawn mower apart and figured out why it wasn't working (and I am a computer geek by trade) that was so rewarding for me it wasn't even funny.

Keep busy. I find that if I keep busy I don't sit around and say ok - 2.5 more months and I get to see hubby. I have also found if I have something else closer to look forward to it helps. This time between visits to see hubby is about 4.5 months - so I planned a trip home (family is about 3500 miles the opposite direction) here the first part of Nov. So when I came home from Korea the end of Aug. I could begin a countdown to go home and see family in two months then when I come back in Nov. I will begin a countdown of two months to see hubby. 2 months is a lot easier than 4 months (or maybe I am just insane to actually believe that)

Most important - yes they are your friends and I am not saying don't listen to what they have to say about the situation but please do what you have to do to make things work out for you and hubby - everything else will work out in the long run. Yes there will be times that it is very hard - times where I cry since I just want to come home and have hubby hold me after a bad day and he isn't here to do that...

But I have a great friend here that will give me a hug when I need one and that helps.

My hubby has been military for 16 years - we have been married for 5 and started dating in 1999. I was in Iowa when we dated and he was here in Alaska. For the 5 years we have been married I think hubby has been home maybe 2 years of that. But we have a very happy marriage, I love him with all my heart and I know this is going to work for us. If it wasn't it wouldn't be so hard to leave him everything I have to.

Sorry this is so long - I didn't expect it to get this long.

Stacie

biochemtine · 10-23-2005, 07:01 PM

Stacie --- what part of AK are you in?

dimplespoo · 10-23-2005, 10:09 PM

I am in Anchorage. I think we are called on the news the "South Central" Part. Where we actually have sunlight part of the days all year and snow just for about 5 months..

Stacie

biochemtine · 10-24-2005, 12:03 PM

I know AK. My mother grew up in Fairbanks and my Grandpa still lives there.

10-14-2005, 09:52 PM	#11 (permalink)
Tonya Member Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Tulsa, OK Posts: 11 Recipes: Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: Tell me we're not crazy..... Also remember these days with free long distance on cell phones and instant messaging on computers you can still keep in touch. My DH has finally finished upgrading to the Captian seat in the 757 and he has been home only 7 days in the last 3 months due to the training and now being low man on the captain senority list. However we had one of the best nights together last night. I am in Tulsa and was in Maine. We watched Survivor and CSI together while we were on our cell phones to one another and then we got on line and instant messaged each other for an hour sharing stories about our day, news articles we had read, ideas, and photos. Some times it would take to much to explain what we meant so we would just pick up the cell phone and clarify. With the technology these days you can still share your lives even if you only see each other occasionally. In the ten years I have been with my DH we have gone through 4 years of him home only 3 or 4 days a month (usually the days I had to work). One whole summer that he never left home and everything in between. Just remember to remain flexible and you will be OK and that is all that really matters.

10-15-2005, 01:51 PM	#12 (permalink)
MQAAord Jetgirls Ol' School Member Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: A Happy Place Posts: 668 Recipes: Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: Tell me we're not crazy..... Go for it. Non-airline people DON'T understand. OTR truck divers and military are the only other people who could possibly have any clue what our lives are like. You'll hear lots of things from non-airline people, including: "Well, you know he's gonna be fooling around with those flight attendants on his overnights." "What do you mean you can't afford it? Your husband's a pilot, they make lots of money." "Oh, he's a pilot? All they do is sit up there and push buttons and read the paper." "Those pilots are paid way too much. They don't do anything to earn all that money." You learn to educate people as best you can, and blow the rest off.

10-15-2005, 08:07 PM	#13 (permalink)
roz Jetgirls Ol' School Member Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Philly Posts: 2,312 Recipes: Thanks: 0 Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts	Re: Tell me we're not crazy..... I have a friend who is married to a guy in the merchant marines. He's gone for six months at a time.

10-17-2005, 12:29 AM	#15 (permalink)
Lurker Jetgirls Member Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Hong Kong Posts: 187 Recipes: Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: Tell me we're not crazy..... What I wouldn't give for BF to be only 100 miles away insted of 6,000.

10-17-2005, 12:40 PM	#16 (permalink)
biochemtine Jetgirls Ol' School Member Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: San Francisco Bay Area Posts: 630 Recipes: Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: Tell me we're not crazy..... ahhh ..... but we did the dating thing and now we're married. it's much different being married than dating. I could handle it when we were dating.

10-23-2005, 12:03 AM	#17 (permalink)
dimplespoo Member Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Mcloud, Oklahoma Posts: 24 Recipes: Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: Tell me we're not crazy..... I am in the same situation right now except hubby is quite a few more miles (about 3500 miles right now). I am in Alaska, Hubby is in South Korea. He has been there since Oct. 2004 and won't be home for good until Oct. 2006. He is military and was only supposed to be gone for 1 year. We did this so we could try to stay in Alaska and I could keep my job. We found out about 4 months into the first year that we were not going to be able to stay in Alaska and would have to go to Oklahoma. Not the worst but not where we wanted to be. So hubby put in to stay another year. He got the other year and a 3 year tour back to Alaska after that. He get a trip home 1/2 way through each tour for 30 days. I make a trip every 3 months from that. He left in Oct. I saw him in Feb, he was home in May, I went back over in August and now won't go back to see him until late January. We love Alaska and we wanted to keep me in my job here. It is a great job (all three of my bosses are military so they understand short notice hubby has to leave which makes it very nice). We had most of our trouble (or people not understanding) from Military friends. One told me that I didn't LOVE my husband enough if I was willing to "let" him do this and another told me I was more into the money from my job them my hubby and my marriage. I had a hard time with this but we are making it work. My advice if I can put in my .02... Make this time apart a way to make you better. Grab a new hobby - I found that I am learning to do alot of things that hubby would normally do that I am taking care of now. This summer I tore the lawn mower apart and figured out why it wasn't working (and I am a computer geek by trade) that was so rewarding for me it wasn't even funny. Keep busy. I find that if I keep busy I don't sit around and say ok - 2.5 more months and I get to see hubby. I have also found if I have something else closer to look forward to it helps. This time between visits to see hubby is about 4.5 months - so I planned a trip home (family is about 3500 miles the opposite direction) here the first part of Nov. So when I came home from Korea the end of Aug. I could begin a countdown to go home and see family in two months then when I come back in Nov. I will begin a countdown of two months to see hubby. 2 months is a lot easier than 4 months (or maybe I am just insane to actually believe that) Most important - yes they are your friends and I am not saying don't listen to what they have to say about the situation but please do what you have to do to make things work out for you and hubby - everything else will work out in the long run. Yes there will be times that it is very hard - times where I cry since I just want to come home and have hubby hold me after a bad day and he isn't here to do that... But I have a great friend here that will give me a hug when I need one and that helps. My hubby has been military for 16 years - we have been married for 5 and started dating in 1999. I was in Iowa when we dated and he was here in Alaska. For the 5 years we have been married I think hubby has been home maybe 2 years of that. But we have a very happy marriage, I love him with all my heart and I know this is going to work for us. If it wasn't it wouldn't be so hard to leave him everything I have to. Sorry this is so long - I didn't expect it to get this long. Stacie

10-23-2005, 07:01 PM	#18 (permalink)
biochemtine Jetgirls Ol' School Member Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: San Francisco Bay Area Posts: 630 Recipes: Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: Tell me we're not crazy..... Stacie --- what part of AK are you in?

10-23-2005, 10:09 PM	#19 (permalink)
dimplespoo Member Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Mcloud, Oklahoma Posts: 24 Recipes: Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: Tell me we're not crazy..... I am in Anchorage. I think we are called on the news the "South Central" Part. Where we actually have sunlight part of the days all year and snow just for about 5 months.. Stacie

10-24-2005, 12:03 PM	#20 (permalink)
biochemtine Jetgirls Ol' School Member Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: San Francisco Bay Area Posts: 630 Recipes: Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: Tell me we're not crazy..... I know AK. My mother grew up in Fairbanks and my Grandpa still lives there.

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