Confusion. Was there a vote taken?

[SeatClutcher]

Originally Posted by czechmate

Oh yeah, regarding the anon postings...what if anon was only available in the safehouse?

I was thinking that yesterday, too. The safehouse, and maybe "ask a nurse practitioner."

Used in a discussion or argument, the option gets pretty abused.

[flyershoe]

I was one of the people who initially thought that the "Ask the Guys" section was a good idea... I was surprised to see how quickly it degenerated from jokes about fashion to yet another regionals vs. majors bashing session.

I think that part of the problem is more with giving unsolicited advice as opposed to answering people's questions.

As far as the anonymous issue... the message is more important than the sender, don't you think? If you connect a message or viewpoint that you don't like with a certain person, then you are more likely to view that person in a negative light. If XYZ person posts a message that they're not overly religious and ABC person is offended by it, then ABC person might thing "Well, if they don't practice whatever religion, then I don't care what they say about anything." That's probably a bad example, but hopefully someone understands what I'm getting at??

[SeatClutcher]

Originally Posted by flyershoe

I was one of the people who initially thought that the "Ask the Guys" section was a good idea... I was surprised to see how quickly it degenerated from jokes about fashion to yet another regionals vs. majors bashing session.

I think that part of the problem is more with giving unsolicited advice as opposed to answering people's questions.

As far as the anonymous issue... the message is more important than the sender, don't you think? If you connect a message or viewpoint that you don't like with a certain person, then you are more likely to view that person in a negative light. If XYZ person posts a message that they're not overly religious and ABC person is offended by it, then ABC person might thing "Well, if they don't practice whatever religion, then I don't care what they say about anything." That's probably a bad example, but hopefully someone understands what I'm getting at??

It's understandable, but if someone is going to hold a grudge over a difference of opinion, isn't it better to know who would do that? It's immature.

We're already hidden behind keyboards. Surely we're adult enough to allow our screen names to stand by our opinions.

Great quote: those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.

[flyershoe]

Originally Posted by SeatClutcher

It's understandable, but if someone is going to hold a grudge over a difference of opinion, isn't it better to know who would do that? It's immature.

We're already hidden behind keyboards. Surely we're adult enough to allow our screen names to stand by our opinions.

Great quote: those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.

It might be immature, but I'm sure that most of us are guilty of it at some point. I won't give any specific examples here, but I've definitely read some peoples' posts that have made me think "wow, what a/an ........" and that person might have a completely valid point on something that concerns me, but I probably wouldn't take it as seriously because I'm already biased. I guess that since I "mind", I don't matter??

And we're not entirely hidden behind keyboards - some of us have met in person.

[SeatClutcher]

Originally Posted by flyershoe

It might be immature, but I'm sure that most of us are guilty of it at some point. I won't give any specific examples here, but I've definitely read some peoples' posts that have made me think "wow, what a/an ........" and that person might have a completely valid point on something that concerns me, but I probably wouldn't take it as seriously because I'm already biased. I guess that since I "mind", I don't matter??

And we're not entirely hidden behind keyboards - some of us have met in person.

Do you not disagree with people in person?

(I think what I'm not understanding is why grown women can't disagree without hiding. I don't know that the danger of a bias is a compelling reason - if you are prone to applying biases [as many of us are...I know of one poster on JC I'm almost always tempted to automatically dismiss because...well, because], it's worth recognizing that and taking the time to consciously dismiss that bias, and then read the post for what it is. It encourages personal communication growth! At least, it has in me.)

[Kristie]

Originally Posted by Anonymous

Nope, sorry- not EVERYONE agreed to have the guys come to this forum. I don't recall a vote taken as I would have voted against that one. Isn't that what JetCareers is for? Infact the original "Respect for hubby" thread was NOT posted under the Ask the guys section at all.

I prefer Jetgirls to be just that Jetgirls- not Jetgirls and their overbearing, opinionated DH/SO's.

Originally Posted by Bigsweetie

I don't think there IS a huge backlash against it. Just people saying they don't intend to use it. Not that they want it removed! I think there's LOTS of people here who "need to lighten up".

based on the original posters quote, that's not what i'm understanding. my understanding is that not only do they not want the "ask the guys" forum (they don't mention intention of use) but they also don't want guys here period. that's my understanding, so i see that as a HUGE backlash and instead of it being a construction change, something like that would be a destructive change in my opinion. I'm all for constructive change...but this is not constructive.

If their intention is to not use the "ask a guy" forum, then that's fine by me. it's not really my business as to whether they use it or not.

I agree that the purpose of the anon is based on what's *inside* the message of the post vs whose posting it. But in some instances, it's being used as a shield and that was not the purpose of bringing the anon availability on board. I really don't like the idea of keeping the anon only in the safehouse or what not but if that's what needs to be done, i might just have to implement that.

[patty@myflightsurgeon.com]

Originally Posted by Kristie

shouldn't this topic be in the "ask the guys" forum?

YOU (the members) asked me to put that forum up, said it was a good idea...i didn't hear any NO's come out of anyone's mouth...since there seemed to be overwhelming applaud for the idea, i put up the forum. Are you saying, now, that you don't want the answers to the questions you were thinking of asking? that you don't want male perspective or you don't want males, much less pilots, here at all now...is that what i'm hearing? because i'm sorry, but anyone and everyone is welcome on here. if at anytime i discriminate against any one person, that's the day i shut this board down.

other guys have always been apart of this forum and just now, maybe because of a few heated up threads, you want ALL the guys to leave - am i correct in that assumption?

What's wrong with some heat? I love it when people debate or argue with me, it shows they've got passion and courage...like Christykay, believe it or not, i have a lot of respect for her because she stands up for herself and altho her and i have shot cannons across each others bow, i learned something from her just as she's probably learned a few things from me and i'm sure someday we're gonna meet up and buy each other a coke or beer or something.

Hiding behind an anonymous tag for this particular thread or threads where people call out "oh, I don't want to be attacked" when this forum is actually pretty calm (compared to others that i'm apart of), is pretty cowardly in my opinion. stand up, be proud, be firm and be real about your decisons. There hasn't been one day that i haven't thought of using the anon tag but honestly, it's like pushing the easy button when your trying to make a point..and when you make a point like this using the anon tag, i see a cowardly lion standing behind the tin man.

The anon tag is there for the folks who need it for support with your relationship, when your just not comfortable talking about real life stuff, not for this purpose.

if you're too chicken to talk, gain valuable knowledge, get support, stick up for yourself and have some debate time then this board may not be for you. I won't be cultivating, like someone said, a pleasantville/stepford wives type of community. I expect things to get heated every now and then... it can't always BE kumbaya...

btw, there doesn't need to be a vote. this is a one woman owned board. i place the vote on how it's run and i make sure it stays the course. this board isn't a democracy

Thank-You!!!!! I thought I opened a can of worms when I read this thread this morning, and I had told myself that since I am not in the aviation business that the last thread I posted would be my last.

I don't want to step on anyones toes, so I think from now on I will keep my opinions to myself.

[Bigsweetie]

Originally Posted by Kristie

based on the original posters quote, that's not what i'm understanding. my understanding is that not only do they not want the "ask the guys" forum (they don't mention intention of use) but they also don't want guys here period. that's my understanding, so i see that as a HUGE backlash and instead of it being a construction change, something like that would be a destructive change in my opinion. I'm all for constructive change...but this is not constructive.

If their intention is to not use the "ask a guy" forum, then that's fine by me. it's not really my business as to whether they use it or not.

I agree that the purpose of the anon is based on what's *inside* the message of the post vs whose posting it. But in some instances, it's being used as a shield and that was not the purpose of bringing the anon availability on board. I really don't like the idea of keeping the anon only in the safehouse or what not but if that's what needs to be done, i might just have to implement that.

I guess our definition of HUGE is different. I heard a couple of people saying they shouldn't be here, not everyone. I tend to not be an "all or nothing" kind of person and try not to use those words in posts.

As for the Anon thing, I think limiting that feature will just cause more people to not post their opinion at all. And, as you've stated yourself, that's not what you want on this board. Of course, it's "your living room" and it doesn't really affect me anyway since I don't post that way.

I'm officially done posting on this topic. I'm too tired and pg for this nonsense.

[Doogie]

Just a little note from the peanut gallery. Everyone's already anonymous as it is.

Like I know who SeatClutcher is, but I'll bet you 99% of the rest of the site could be in the cubicle next door to her and have no idea who it is without her formally introducing herself as such.

You can't look up "Doogie" in the phone book and leave a lit bag of poopie on his first doorstep.

At least I hope not!

[the_woman_99]

For whatever it is worth I like the 'ask the guys' section. If you don't like it then just stay out of it. Why should it matter if the guys are here or not. I mean I think that it is a great place to talk with the woman. And if maybe a guy wants to get on and say something then there is nothing wrong with that either.
I think that it is kind of funny reading this because some of you say how you don't go on jetcareers because some/most of the guys tend to 'shoot' you down or what not and that is the reason you don't go over there and post anymore because they don't make you feel welcome or don't value your opinion or what not. Isn't that the same thing you are doing here? Some of you are mad that they are here for whatever reason but if that is the case just carry on as if they aren't here. Like it has been mentioned before you don't HAVE to ask the guys anything if you don't want to. But I think that they should have every right to post here if they want.
I think that the 'ask the guys' is great because for myself I don't have a lot of guys in my life. I was raised with all sisters so there are no brother and of course there is my dad but he doesn't know ANYTHING about aviation and the lifestyle I have with my SO. It isn't that I wouldn't ask my SO those same questions but it is nice sometimes to see it from different angles. It doesn't mean that I have to take what is said as 'gold'. I just take it for what it is worth. It should just be left at that. IMO
As for the anon issue....If you want to put it in the safehouse then do it. It doesn't really matter either way. I think that anyone here would hopefully be comfortable enough to speak as themselves. I agree that there are some issues that may be to personal or what not to share as you are but I beleive that that is what the safehouse is for anyways. The more taboo subjects???
Again all of this is JMO.