New Respect for Hubby

[Anonymous]

Roz isn't speaking for only herself, she is representing other posters on this board who have PM'd her. Some of us don't feel comfortable posting for fear of being attacked for our views.

[SeatClutcher]

Where is this big perception of "attacks" coming from?

Is disagreeing with someone now being viewed as attacking? I have yet to see anything that looks remotely like a borderline attack, even.

I would shudder to think there's an expectation of nice-nice on this board that would have us all fearful of getting opinionated because we wouldn't want to offend someone's sensibilities. I understand the distaste for attacks, but disagreements are healthy, and having attitude is natural. PLEASE let's not turn this board into a Pleasantville/Stepford community.

[Amanda]

Originally Posted by Anonymous

IThose that started somewhere like Mesa or Eagle are more likely to want to get out ASAP as opposed to Skywest, ExpressJet, and Air Whiskey. I'm just going by what I've heard others say.

Ain't that the truth, speaking from Nick's experience with Mesa.

I've been staying away from this thread since it seems to have opened up a lot of emotions. I hope people feel comfortable posting no matter what your individual situation may be. It makes me sad when I see a new person join and then shortly after posting for the first time, they disappear. I wonder what happens to them.

For me personally, you can look up my posts when I first joined... I have been with Nick since "the beginning". I had no idea what to expect in this relationship so I looked for boards such as this one.

Just like most of you agree, each of our situations is different and that's what makes this board so interesting and helpful. I met Nick when he had 400 hours and was a flight instructor. Even though he had a great job as a manager and was using his Engineering degree, he told me that he recently changed his career at age 28 since he had always wanted to be a pilot. He said his ultimate goal was to fly internationally on the 757. I He got hired at Mesa, but had no desire to stay. We weren't married and had no kids which made it a bit easier for him since he went from base to base (I never followed)- his priority was to get as many hours as possible and move to the left seat to get PIC time. IF we were married or had kids or IF he was working at a better airline (with better QOL), maybe he would have stayed longer at the regional level. Who knows. He worked hard, networked, and he reached his goal of flying internationally on the 757. For him, he is loving his job and he loves the airline. His base is near our friends and family, so it works well for us, especially since we will be getting married and having a baby (hopefully) in the next year or so. We talked about children recently and he will most likely move to domestic after we have kids. Yes, he loves international flying, but family is important and his priorities will change.

I like reading about everyone's experiences in this crazy ever-changing industry. I hope I have been respectful to everyone's individual situation. If not, PM me! I hope people feel comfortable posting on this board. We don't all have to agree but we should be respectful of each other and of the choices that we have made.\

[Chi829]

I totally agree with you Amanda,,, we don't have to agree,, sometimes it's healthy not to,,, however the key is to be "respectful" and Im not too sure I've seen enough of that lately.

[roz]

Thank you for moving it Kristie--I don't know where anything belongs since Doug has three threads going on the same topic!!!!!! Some of the messages appear to have disappeared, however, so I can't quote them. But I have so many emails from disturbed members quoting them, I probably could.

I guess I'm responding to (from all the different threads...) These are Doug's comments:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As a pilot, anyone who says that "international ain't all that" is kidding himself.

Seriously, I was "that guy".

Domestic, you're excited if you get a long layover in Detroit. International, it's way different and if it's a new city you bring a long of experience home that's refreshing.

It's different, it's better. I didn't have that good of a layover in Bucharest, Romania, but I'll tell you, the worst international layover has been about 5x better than my absolute best domestic layover.

Trust me, anyone who says, "International ain't all that" hasn't done it.

`````````````````````````````````````````````

I'm not the boss, just another perspective. Been domestic, done that, not in a rush to get back. Me likes flying to Europe.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sigh. Negative Nancies trying to hijack the website and then turn it around on us and say that we're the negatives... GRR

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And Kristie's comments:

Doug's perspective is just that, his perspective. Everyone's is their own, just like you stated and no one's is the "only" perspective, just like you stated. but he's entitled to it just as much as anyone else. When he talks international, it's with his airline only since he cannot relate to how the other airlines operate their international fleet (i mean that should be obvious shouldn't it?). I have not yet found a thread or post where he says that only he is right or that his way is the only way. you must be assuming that's what he meant or you interpreted it that way? i'm still looking but i betcha i won't find anything because he doesn't talk that way. again, he's a motivator, he wants to see everyone reach their potential and goals - whatever they may be. he's never said that international is the end all be all (i can't find those words exactly as stated) and if the hostility you're feeling like you said, is based on individual interpretation (of which you are entitled to) and not the outside world, then why are you bringing it back into the outside world, into the forums? you should be keeping that between you and doug (via PM), it's obviously a problem you two should solve or agree to disagree.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Now go back to the original post by Doug in which he says international is the end all and be all. He calls those of us who point out other views as Negative Nancies. Come on.

Kristie, the bottom line is that everyone's situation is different. Doug has not been presenting it as his perspective. He has been adament that his opinion is fact and that those who disagree have hijacked the website and are Negative Nancies. Should I tell my husband to quit his job and go sit on the bottom at Delta when all he wants to do is upgrade? According to Doug's orgininal post, I should. My husband has a few choice words for him!

Anyway, if Doug is only posting his perspective, he is not saying that. It is not obvious that he doesn't know other airlines. He doesn't say that. He says international is all that. He is saying that his experience is the motivator for all. That is not true. He keeps saying he is a motivator. I thought he was a pilot who had a great wife! If he want's to be a motivator, they get paid $100,000 per appearance. He's in the wrong business flying and saying he's a motivator! If he want's to be a motivator, he's underpaid!!!!!!!!!!

What we are saying is that he should post his experiences as that. Some may like seeing the food he eats; some may not. Everyone is in a different place! That's what makes this board great. It's not helpful to come on and tell members that they should push their husbands to "international" flying or else they have not lived the dream. What is that anyway?

[Anonymous]

Originally Posted by Kristie

Doug's perspective is just that, his perspective. Everyone's is their own, just like you stated and no one's is the "only" perspective, just like you stated. but he's entitled to it just as much as anyone else.

I have not yet found a thread or post where he says that only he is right or that his way is the only way. you must be assuming that's what he meant or you interpreted it that way?

then why are you bringing it back into the outside world, into the forums? you should be keeping that between you and doug (via PM), it's obviously a problem you two should solve or agree to disagree.

Each post/thread is based on each persons perspective of what they've seen/gone through, we all know that...but again, he is just as entitled to that perspective as is anyone else on the board.

It seems that you have some other problem with doug that is may be underlying apart from this topic. Whatever it is, your more than welcome to try and work it out with him away from the forum (via PM maybe?)

i'm sorry, but really, i think this has gone far. from what i have read there really seems to be 'some' underlying issues here that should be taken care of, outside of the forumn, really it puts a damper into coming onto the site, and looking for advice/experience/laughter

AGAIN THIS IS JUST MY OPINION

[CLErocks]

Originally Posted by Anonymous

[b]

i'm sorry, but really, i think this has gone far. from what i have read there really seems to be 'some' underlying issues here that should be taken care of, outside of the forumn, really it puts a damper into coming onto the site, and looking for advice/experience/laughter

AGAIN THIS IS JUST MY OPINION

Agree to the fullest! It seems to keep going and going and going

[Kelly]

I have found this site, and JC extremely valuable. I have learned so much, and I have Kristie, Doug and everyone who posts to thank for that. I still don't think anyone has been personally attacked, like everyone else has said, we all have our opinions. When reading posts from "strong minded" individuals, I always keep in mind that this is someones opinion, if I don't agree with it, so be it, I move on.
My opinion, some people are taking this all WAY too seriously.

[patty@myflightsurgeon.com]

Originally Posted by Anonymous

Roz isn't speaking for only herself, she is representing other posters on this board who have PM'd her. Some of us don't feel comfortable posting for fear of being attacked for our views.

My .02 cents is.....
If you feel you have something to contribute to the discussion the you should not fear what you have to say. NO 2 people have the same mind and each of us have our own opinion.
That what makes this forum work all of us learning from each other. Others opinions, others thoughts.
And if I am not mistaken everyone agreed to have the GUYS come to this forum to give some insight to the male side of things soooooooo............
If what they have to say has some effect on you take what you need from it and if not just ignore it.
Ok end of rant

[Doogie]

A couple of points, Roz. We created this, and other sites with our bare hands.

You've spoken your peace on the topic, we disagree, big deal but realize that you're more or less arguing with the preacher during his sermon.

We have a difference of opinion. I've seen about three different angles of the business between regional, domestic and international and yes, in my strange world, I know what I'm talking about.

If you'd like, you can form an army of the willing and wield signs of protest at my front door, but that's not going to cause me to refrain from giving other pilots hope that there's a light at the end of the terminal.

I get disaffected emails from pilots who've "lost the love" on a daily basis, but when they see that there's something higher to aim for, they've been able to reinvigorate the career goals and are grateful. Come on out to NetworkJC, I'll print some and show them to you. Some of the 'army of non-believers' that post anonymously may have husbands that have emailed me during the last four months of the new gig. It'd be enlightening for us all to do more listening and learning.

Keep in mind that my opinion isn't more relevant than anyone elses opinion, but in a group of non-pilots, I'm afraid that it does indeed out-trump yours regarding aviation.

I know nothing about being married -to- a pilot so I generally will point people towards those with first hand experience. You catch the drift I'm sure.

Have a great day. I know I am! Just got back from Moscow, had an opportunity to race Irans Amijimabad (sps?) aircraft across the tracks so we could arrive in JFK before the shut the airport down for his
arrival and have some more photos to share with my users.

There are people who appreciate my blunt insight. Others, including yourself don't. That's cool, but remember this is our living room.

A great day to ya!