[Regina]

I agree with trista: approach cautiously, if that is what you plab to do. My opinion is that if the same kids have thrown out other words or done other things that you feel uncomfortable with, I would be finding my kids new playmates...maybe just even a break from those other kids. If you do a break, the mom might approach you to ask why your boys haven't been over. Another solution is to only have the neighbors come over to your house where you could supervise. If a word comes up, you could approach all the boys at the same time saying that those words are not acceptable in your house..possibly even sending the boys home at that for the effect. My sister-in-law did that to a neighbor boy awhile back...the boy ended up coming over the next day to apologize, promising not to use the word again. He didn't want to miss out playing with his friends.

I also think that some words are not considered bad in some people's household. For example, my m-in-law has a thing about shut-up. She considers it horrible, I think it is a word to use cautiously. Or another example is idiot and retard. These words are never to be spoken in an unkind fashion in my house. My kids cousins use the words as no big deal. If I heard them use those words in my house, they would be warned once, and sent home the next time. I would also be limiting the time my kids spent with those kids because I think those words are cruel and making fun of people with disabilities. I want my kids to learn kindness to people that are challenged, not something like using those words out of cruelty. I guess what I am saying is that certain words just aren't any big deal to some, and although the kids say them, especially at a young age, it is just out of constantly hearing them and not that the kids are bad or bad influences. BUT...if it is important to you, stick to your feelings. Explain to your own kids what is appropriate in your household, and if you do hear the neighbor kids say it, you can always say to them (if it is in your home) that if they would like to stay and play, then you expect them to follow the same rules as your boys and not use that kind of language.