[UPSwife]

Hello. I am also married, but remember oh so clearly the early days of dating a pilot.

When I met my husband, he was working a lot of reserve--on 16 days and off 12. He got called out of town sometimes for the entire 16 days, other times for 1-2 days at a time. Either way it was hard. But, I knew he was not the type to cheat and I knew the relationship was worth it.

My best advice to you is to be flexible and understanding. This really helped me in the beginning. Since my boyfriend (at the time, now husband) had no control over his schedule, I just had to trust that he would call me when he had the time and would try to see me when he was home. I learned early on that he was good for his word which made the trust part much easier. He respected the fact that I was my own person and had a career/life without him.

As time went on, I told him that I wanted to hear from him when he was away--whether that mean a postcard, an e-mail, or a phone call. It is still difficult since he often flies internationally, but he did invest in "skype" which was a great way to keep in touch.

I think that as the relationship progresses, you will learn how he works more and will be able to communicate with him regardless of the circumstances. I think that is the key--figuring out how the communication will work best in your situation--because it varies from relationship to relationship.

Felicia