Jetgirls.net - View Single Post

fly-girl · 06-25-2004, 01:33 PM

Hi Andrea,

You sound like you have been very busy lately! I hope all is well up in Wisconsin. I am going up to Osh Kosh for a wedding in August and it will be my first visit there so I'm looking forward to it. I may not have as much wisdom to offer as some of the other ladies in this forum but I must say that I think sitting reserve is one of the most difficult times to get through in a relationship, especially if your boyfriend has to commute to reserve--that makes it even harder.

I had some of the same feelings you are going through when my df left for training. We had only been dating for about 8 months at the time and we didn't know about his travel benefits yet so when he moved to Houston and I was in school in KY, I had absolutely no clue when we were going to see each other again, not to mention what was going to happen to us. It was difficult to get through but as long as you two trust each other it isn't as bad.

As far as wondering if you can make the relationship work for a lifetime, all I can say is that it will get better. I know you've probably heard that a million times (I still hear it all the time) He won't sit reserve forever and his schedules will continue to improve. My relationship with my df was difficult when he was on reserve because things always seemed so out of control. sometimes he would think he would be able to come home one night and then scheduling would call and he would have to do a trip that wouldn't get him back in time to get to come home. I like to think that I have gotten better at adjusting to this life style but really I think it is because his schedule has improved that I am able to handle things better.

I also used to feel the same way you do about how can you build a relationship when you are never together and I'm not sure exactly how I dealt with it. I think it just eventually becomes easier with time. I wish I had a better answer for you.

A long distance relationship is very hard--but it does help you to appreciate the time that you do get to spend together. I was always so jealous of my friends whose boyfriends lived in the same city and they could see each other whenever they wanted. I don't mean to be harsh when I say this but it sounds like Hans may be taking you for granted a little. I apologize if I am off base with that.

Hope things get better. at least you two are talking about it and you aren't keeping it bottled up inside and pretending to be happy.

06-25-2004, 01:33 PM	#2 (permalink)
fly-girl Jetgirls Member Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: CVG Posts: 126 Recipes: Thanks: 1 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	Re: It\'s been a while... Hi Andrea, You sound like you have been very busy lately! I hope all is well up in Wisconsin. I am going up to Osh Kosh for a wedding in August and it will be my first visit there so I'm looking forward to it. I may not have as much wisdom to offer as some of the other ladies in this forum but I must say that I think sitting reserve is one of the most difficult times to get through in a relationship, especially if your boyfriend has to commute to reserve--that makes it even harder. I had some of the same feelings you are going through when my df left for training. We had only been dating for about 8 months at the time and we didn't know about his travel benefits yet so when he moved to Houston and I was in school in KY, I had absolutely no clue when we were going to see each other again, not to mention what was going to happen to us. It was difficult to get through but as long as you two trust each other it isn't as bad. As far as wondering if you can make the relationship work for a lifetime, all I can say is that it will get better. I know you've probably heard that a million times (I still hear it all the time) He won't sit reserve forever and his schedules will continue to improve. My relationship with my df was difficult when he was on reserve because things always seemed so out of control. sometimes he would think he would be able to come home one night and then scheduling would call and he would have to do a trip that wouldn't get him back in time to get to come home. I like to think that I have gotten better at adjusting to this life style but really I think it is because his schedule has improved that I am able to handle things better. I also used to feel the same way you do about how can you build a relationship when you are never together and I'm not sure exactly how I dealt with it. I think it just eventually becomes easier with time. I wish I had a better answer for you. A long distance relationship is very hard--but it does help you to appreciate the time that you do get to spend together. I was always so jealous of my friends whose boyfriends lived in the same city and they could see each other whenever they wanted. I don't mean to be harsh when I say this but it sounds like Hans may be taking you for granted a little. I apologize if I am off base with that. Hope things get better. at least you two are talking about it and you aren't keeping it bottled up inside and pretending to be happy.